October, 2008
One of the bonus points of being married - is the ability to join your finances. Well, I suppose it wouldn't be a bonus if the person you married was a near-bankrupt spend-thrift....but, fortunately for me, I married a man that had a similar view of the FINANCIAL world...earn it, save some and spend a little.
And, during these troubled times - it's nice to have a partner in finance who is truly on the same team as you.
By August, I had paid off my Honda Civic. Yipppee, another monthly payment that was being distinguished. The thrill of the Pay-Off was short lived, however - when the Honda Finance Agent on the other end of the phone told me that he'd mail me the Title - and he added, "Then, you'll take that to the DMV and have the title transferred to your name."
My heart skipped a beat, "What?" I nearly yelped. "I have to go to the DMV? Really? Is there ANY OTHER WAY?"
The Honda Guy sighed, "I'm afraid not. But, hey - Congratulations on paying off your vehicle, it's been our pleasure doing business with you."
"Yea, Yea, whatever....." I mumbled. I broke out in a sweat as we hung up the phone.
The DMV and the Social Security offices had been FAR TOO familiar to me in the last several months.
ANOTHER by-product of my HOLY UNION to the Southern Gentleman was that I had to have all of my legal documents changed over to my new married name. As independent as I proclaim to be - I had decided to take the name of my husband. After each prolonged trip to the government agencies to get my social security card changed THEN my drivers license - I would enter the front door of our Townhouse and proclaim;
"We are NEVER getting divorced because I NEVER want to go through this crap again. You are STUCK with me"
Each time the Southern Gent would smile and say, "I know baby, I know....."
It took me a couple of weeks to get both the courage and the energy to make yet another pilgrimage to the local DMV location. In fact, I took the whole day off from work. I didn't want the additional stress of having to coordinate this trip with my work schedule too.
I purposefully arrived at the store-front location at approximately 11:20am. I figured the morning rush would already have dissipated and the lunch crowd wouldn't have arrived yet. Logical, right?
I parked my newly paid off car and crossed the parking lot to the front entrance. I thought it was a good sign that the line wasn't out the door and spilling onto the sidewalk. I'd heard those horror stories from folks who'd made this trip before me.
I entered and my nostrils sucked in the damp, dank and musty fragrance that results from too many people in too small of a space for too long of a time. UGH. I prepared for the worst.
I glanced up at the dingy wooden signs hanging by chain links from the ceiling. The signs gave instructions as to which line you were supposed to stand in, depending on which service you needed. I was thrilled to see that my designated line was nearly 10 people shorter than the other. Okay, another good omen.
I took my place at the end of the line. As sipped from my water bottle, I visually grazed the crowd surrounding me. This DMV line was a diverse mix of people that could rival a UNITED NATIONS monthly meeting. Every age, gender and ethnic group were represented in this tiny, stuffy location in North Carolina. Good gracious.
Had I crossed the equator?? Damn! I didn't have my Pass Port.
Once I'd assessed the make-up of the crowd, I glanced at my watch. A few minutes had passed and I was still standing on the dirty linoleum tile at the end of the line. However, now four more people were behind me.
I noticed an uncomfortable tension and a low murmur in the crowd ahead of me. It was then, that I saw the bright yellow plastic sign with red letters - OUT TO LUNCH. Apparently, as I'd entered the DMV... the lady who'd been serving OUR LINE had defiantly dismissed the crowd in front of her as she placed her sign on the counter and left her post. Lovely.
I chortled out loud at the IRONY of an OUT-TO-LUNCH sign posted by a worker at a DMV office. I mean, hello? Isn't it the public perception that all the government workers employed by the DMV are PERMANENTLY out-to-lunch??? Isn't that a personality REQUIREMENT to working there?
The Asian woman a few folks ahead of me, turned and smiled. I asked her how long she'd been standing in this line, "nearly an hour & a half," she chirped sweetly. I was amazed by her perky attitude in the face of such...CRAPPY SERVICE!
The young Hispanic woman standing directly in front of me, shifted the toddler she was holding. The child was dead weight and fast asleep in her arms. As she did that, the black guy behind me commented that they needed benches so that we could sit down.
My DMV family was taking shape.
Over the course of the next TWO HOURS - I got to know those family members quite well. There was a retired NYC police officer, a tall guy celebrating his birthday, a European couple that looked like they'd stepped off the set of any John Hughes movie from the 80's. The guy behind me kept us all laughing. Although he proclaimed to be an electrician, I told him he'd missed his calling as a comedian.
And, all the while our family gathering was evolving - the DMV workers proceeded to take turns posting the yellow plastic - OUT TO LUNCH sign. I don't know why, but I was amazed and mesmerized by the sheer lunacy of government workers taking lunch breaks... while tired, hungry and angry patrons stood in front of them, waiting for service.
Not to mention, that each worker was either near or severly obese. So, skipping a LUNCH BREAK once in awhile, was probably Doctor recommended!
By the time I reached the front of the line, my back ached, I was out of water and felt like I needed a shower. When it was my turn to approach the damaged counter, I walked to the window of the woman who had LUNCHED first. I'd been in line so long, I actually bit my tongue in an effort to resist the urge to ask her - "Isn't it time for your HAPPY HOUR break?"
Once the experience was over and I climbed back into the vehicle that I now officially OWN, I felt numb and was mentally exhausted. However, I'll always have the memories of my diverse DMV family.
As I turned left onto the road home, I wondered how the tall guy was going to celebrate the rest of his birthday....................
