May, 2009
Recently, the Southern Gentleman and I took a trip to my home state of Wisconsin. This was to be his third visit to the Dairy State...and I was going back to the place where....it ALL began.
Dating all the way back to high school, I remember feeling like there was 'something else out there'. I felt constrained by the borders of Wisconsin. I'm not quite sure if I even knew what I was looking for...I just knew I felt restless and unsettled. And, I knew I needed to spread my wings. I had no clue where the final destination was - or how I'd even get there....but, I had to go searching.....
It was in college, when my dreams started to come into a clearer focus. I'd wanted to be a journalist for as long as I could remember. I'd been writing poems and short stories since I could hold a #2 pencil - and it only made sense to me - that I pursue a career in that business. So, I entered college planning on a career in print journalism. In my junior year... things changed.
A fellow classmate asked me to read the news on the campus radio station. Once the mic. light went on - and I began to speak....I was hooked. I changed my major to Radio Broadcasting the next day.
I've written many times before about my career journey and the twists and turns that have taken me in various directions for various reasons. When I reflect on my personal journey - I realize I've always had a love/hate relationship with my home state. Wisconsin represents missed opportunities, lost jobs and lost love to me.
However, in the last year I think I've finally found some personal peace. That peace is coming from a variety of sources. The addition of the Southern Gentleman to my life is probably a large part of my personal growth.
But, on many levels I still identify with my Sisters-in-Singlehood sorority. I may not qualify to be their leader & President anymore. Yet, I was single for 40 years and there are attitudes and tendencies that just don't vanish because I have a ring on my finger.
Thankfully, I married a man who honors my need to continue to spread my wings and fly. For that, I'm eternally grateful.
This trip back to Wisconsin was to be a bit different. It was the first time that I planned to re-connect with friends I hadn't seen since I left in 2006. I don't leave a large list of folks behind in Wisconsin that I call friend. I've never been able to figure that out. Considering I was born and raised there - one would assume that all my strongest friendships are rooted there. Unfortunately, that's not my reality.
I'm not the gal that has hundreds of high school and college friends that I keep in touch with. I'm the chick that has a handful of super-cool gal pals that I call friend.
Typically my gal-pals are women that have different stories and have travelled different paths to come into my life but who have similar traits in common. They are strong and empowered. They are driven and passionate. Those are the types of ladies I call friend. They are not victims. They are funny, bright and full of energy.
I made plans to connect with three of my Wisconsin based gal-pals. Friday we were hanging with my girl 'S' and Saturday we were hanging with 'D' & 'J'. Not only was it a time for me to re-connect with ladies I'd once been close to but it was an opportunity for them to meet the Southern Gentleman and to get to know the guy that had finally tamed me. Yikes!
It was soooooooooo great to see my girls and share stories from years gone by as well as catch up on their lives right now. I got to see pictures of kids that were mere babies just a minute ago...and we laughed as we ate, drank and reminisced about all the silly things from our past.
Don't worry - I didn't subject the Gent to a weekend of high-levels of Hormonal-Chick energy...there were MEN involved in these reunions. Friday night, there were two other guys in the mix. And, on Saturday 'J' brought her husband. There was a balance.
Each of these ladies represent moments of my past. Things became a bit more clear for the Southern Gentleman as he met the people who were in my world before he came along.
When the weekend was over, I was filled with a warmth I wasn't sure I recognized. It only took a moment to realize that the warmth I felt was actually a new sense of belonging and connection to Wisconsin. Thanks to my gal-pals.
'J' is the gal that took a big chance on me when I entered the world of Senior Health care. With virtually no experience, she took me under her wing and opened up a whole new professional path to me. For that, I will be forever grateful. She encouraged me to learn and allowed me to grow. That's an amazing gift, for sure.
'D' is the gal that's equally as quirky as me. We were two off-beat souls that found each other. Her passion for protecting the elderly is as strong as mine and her heart is as big as all outdoors. She was my 'wing girl' as we navigated, with varying levels of success, through the bar scene in search of....... whatever. Many a crazy night was spent with 'D'. Many a phone call was spent trying to unravel the mysteries of the opposite sex.
'S' is the gal that was right by my side after I lost my job. She's known me since my broadcasting days. She shares my passion for sports and is one of the funniest folks I've ever known. Her one liners and 'witti-cisms' always impress. She's open minded and always seems to be the calm in the storm.
Wisconsin has broken my heart many times over. Yes, there were missed opportunites, job loss and heart break. But, now I have found a new place in my heart for Wisconsin.
Now, I can acknowledge that Wisconsin will always be my original home. My parents and my siblings all live within a 30 mile radius of each other. Family will always connect me to my home state.
Wisconsin, is also the place that I nurtured my love of broadcasting and then, years later was the place that I shifted careers and given a chance to grow in a new industry. Wisconsin is the place where I developed a basketball career that spanned over 20 years and included a free college education. Wisconsin is the place where I embraced good, hard-working, midwestern values that still drive me to this day.
Wisconsin is the place where some of the greatest ladies I've ever met still reside. Yes, I'm finally at a place in my life where I choose not to turn my back on Wisconsin anymore. It may never be my primary zip code....but, it is the place where it ALL BEGAN.
