Unemployment - Third month

August, 2006


August 1st represented the beginning of my third month of unemployment. Or, as I affectionately call it, "The Hiatus." Although, three months wasn't exactly accurate.

I had officially stopped working on March 27, 2006. That was the day I was admitted into the hospital for a hysterectomy. And for those of you with a 'medical terminology deficit', that meant - they were taking out my uterus. The 'thing' a woman needs to have, in order to give birth.

It was bad enough I was getting close to closing out my 30's without a husband, boyfriend or love-interest. Hell, I hadn't been in a relationship since Prez. Clinton was in office. But, now I was going to have to add 'permanent infertility issues' to my pathetic relationship resume. Lovely.

Per Doctors orders, I was going to need a six week medical leave of absence. That little 'tid-bit' certainly didn't go over too well with my employer. Gosh, what a pity I had to inconvenience them with my silly life-altering female issues.

Ironically, I went into this unfortunate situation thinking that a six week absence was a small price to pay for permanent job security. Professionally, I thought this was going to bode well for me in the long run, because I was NEVER going to need maternity leave! Isn't that every employers dream scenario for their female employees?

Well, no such luck. My employer rewarded me by ELIMINATING my Director of Marketing position while I was in the fourth week of that medical leave. My lawyer told me I was fortunate that they gave me a month severance. Hmmm, not to sound ungrateful, but.....I wasn't feeling very fortunate.

June and July flew by and as August began, the novelty of not having to go to work everyday was beginning to wear off. Because I never really had time to officially 'mourn the loss' of my uterus, I was struggling with all kinds of emotions. I'd lost a portion of my female identity and now I'd lost my life-line, my Professional identity.

Now, every day was spent calling, searching, posting, investigating, networking, sending........

It was at the three month mark that I began to notice the isolation. Ironically, I'd always been the life of every party, the leader of every group and the coordinator for most events......
However, now my phone rarely rang. Hell, I couldn't even get former employers or business partners to return my calls for networking purposes.

Socially, I wasn't being invited out for drinks, dinner or....anything. True, I was becoming highly aware of my financial situation. So, to be fair - I wasn't able to maintain the social whirlwind I was caught up in a mere three months earlier. But regardless, it's always nice to be asked.....right?

I had a phone interview on the 15th of August with a Milwaukee based Fortune 100 Company. I was thrilled. I knew I could do the job, I just had to convince them I could do it. Excitement turned into despair, when I was blown off twice by the Phone Interviewer. The first interview came and went - no call. And, the two calls and two e-mails I sent to her, went unanswered. Then, nearly a week later, she called again - apologizing with a message stating, "Oh, like, I'm sorry, I had like the worst week of my LIFE last week"

"Really? You did?", I thought. "Well, don't mind me - I'm just an unemployed single woman in her 30's with a mortgage to pay and no uterus!." UGH! It was infuriating that my career future was in the hands of a 20-something Phone Interviewer who was having a bad week.

She blew me off a second time. And, when we finally connected for the actual phone interview, she practically passed out when I had the nerve to ask her a follow-up question to one of her questions. Apparently, the answer wasn't written on the cue card she was so obviously reading from.

On the 21st of August, I volunteered my time at a golf outing, in an effort to network and stay connected to the Marketing community. During the luncheon, I found out some disturbing news. I was making idle chit-chat with a meek and mousy gentleman sitting next to me. He informed me that he was an administrator of a local healthcare facility. He then proceeded to tell me that he'd just hired Tom 'So & So' to be a manager. "Really?" I said, "I used to work with Tom"

"How long did you work with him?" he asked

"Oh, about a year, " I answered. He smiled and went back to the buffet line, and I had to sit there with a plastic grin on my face without being able to tell him that we'd FIRED TOM from the company for STEALING.

Amazing, I was volunteering my time at a golf outing and 'fired Tom' was already working again.

That was my third month of unemployment.